Posted twenty-five minutes too late in my time zone! It still counts for the 29th, yes? Yes...?
Somewhere in the world, it does.
Anyhow, it feels good to pick up the pens and paper again. Definitely am glad to be back.
For the record, I'm sorry about your grandmother. I showed up at my dad's funeral in male clothes to avoid causing a stir. A number of people still assumed I was his daughter.
The rites of passage are always a bit surreal during transition. For me, a lot of them were almost anticlimactic. I didn't realize they were rites of passage until I thought about them, afterward.
Michele- For starters, thank you for your condolence, and likewise. I had a lot on my mind when I chose my clothes that day. Offending someone or breaking etiquette was a large concern of mine, but not moving forward far overshadowed. My trans* status was just recently told to extended family and the funeral was the first time I had seen them in a while. If I had shown up in a dress, I imagine it may have invalidated my starting transition. Of all things, likely because of my age, I feel being taken seriously is my biggest battle with them.
As for rites of passage, it's interesting to hear another's point of view. I do agree that they feel a bit surreal. I wouldn't call the ones I've had either momentous or anticlimactic, strangely enough. My thoughts run a mile a minute (or so it seems) and I often find myself... how to say... resorting to introspection? I think of the meaning or symbolism in situations instead of the situation at hand, I guess one could say.
The best reason I have for that is, when under stress, looking at life through my writer's lens. Call it a coping habit, or an overactive imagination: either way it's hard to break.
Well, I'll put an end to this rambling. I appreciate your commenting and sharing of experiences. I'm confident in saying it made my day. :) Have a good week! Truly, Ulysses
Thanks for this. It made me cry. But in a good way, if that makes sense.
One of my greatest regrets is that I didn't wear a suit and tie to a friend's funeral. We worked together, and I wasn't out at work, and I didn't want to pull focus or have to deal with awkward comments/questions.
There are so many moments in life that we don't realize are going to be rites of passage until after the fact.
For the record, I'm sorry about your grandmother. I showed up at my dad's funeral in male clothes to avoid causing a stir. A number of people still assumed I was his daughter.
ReplyDeleteThe rites of passage are always a bit surreal during transition. For me, a lot of them were almost anticlimactic. I didn't realize they were rites of passage until I thought about them, afterward.
Michele
Michele-
ReplyDeleteFor starters, thank you for your condolence, and likewise.
I had a lot on my mind when I chose my clothes that day. Offending someone or breaking etiquette was a large concern of mine, but not moving forward far overshadowed. My trans* status was just recently told to extended family and the funeral was the first time I had seen them in a while. If I had shown up in a dress, I imagine it may have invalidated my starting transition. Of all things, likely because of my age, I feel being taken seriously is my biggest battle with them.
As for rites of passage, it's interesting to hear another's point of view. I do agree that they feel a bit surreal. I wouldn't call the ones I've had either momentous or anticlimactic, strangely enough. My thoughts run a mile a minute (or so it seems) and I often find myself... how to say... resorting to introspection? I think of the meaning or symbolism in situations instead of the situation at hand, I guess one could say.
The best reason I have for that is, when under stress, looking at life through my writer's lens. Call it a coping habit, or an overactive imagination: either way it's hard to break.
Well, I'll put an end to this rambling. I appreciate your commenting and sharing of experiences. I'm confident in saying it made my day. :)
Have a good week! Truly, Ulysses
Thanks for this. It made me cry. But in a good way, if that makes sense.
ReplyDeleteOne of my greatest regrets is that I didn't wear a suit and tie to a friend's funeral. We worked together, and I wasn't out at work, and I didn't want to pull focus or have to deal with awkward comments/questions.
There are so many moments in life that we don't realize are going to be rites of passage until after the fact.